Mar 232018
 

Just a couple of days ago, we witnessed the biggest breakup in Hollywood since Brangelina – the breakup of Henry Cavill and his KingStache. He even said goodbye to his beloved moustache with a heartfelt video that he shared on his Instagram.

#ShavedButNotForgotten

A post shared by Henry Cavill (@henrycavill) on Mar 21, 2018 at 2:10am PDT

They were so in love and the breakup came so suddenly, but at least it seems like it was mutual. But now, turns out his moustache has already found someone else.

Chris Evans New PornStache Looks Like Henry Cavill's Old KingStache

The moustache did not even wait before jumping from one superhero to another. Not cool! I can’t even imagine how Henry would be feeling right now.

Chris Evans New PornStache Looks Like Henry Cavill's Old KingStache

The other superhero in question is none other than Captain America himself. Wait, isn’t he supposed to be the good guy? How could he do that to Henry?

Chris Evans New PornStache Looks Like Henry Cavill's Old KingStache© Twitter

Why do you look so sad, Chris?

Chris Evans New PornStache Looks Like Henry Cavill's Old KingStache© Twitter

Is it because you feel bad about stealing Superman’s KingStache?

Well, let’s try to look at things from the moustache’s perspective. Maybe, it thought that being in ‘Justice League’ would be its big debut, but then Warner Bros. went ahead and spent $25 million to basically delete it. That must have hurt, I know, I would be devasted if someone went to that level to exclude me from something.

The moustache must have realized that DC doesn’t deserve it and shifted loyalties to Marvel. Moreover, the moustache moved on just in time, because obviously the biggest thing in pop culture right now is ‘Avengers: Infinity War’ and saw the opportunity to find a superhero that would value it.

But, I guess the moustache hasn’t heard the bad news yet. Captain America is going to die in ‘Avengers: Infinity War’, then what will happen?

I think we’ve established that the moustache is kind of a hoe and a gold-digger, so it’ll probably find another superhero to latch onto.

We have some suggestions. I would personally love to see Tom Hiddleston with a pornstache. That would be hilarious.

Chris Evans New PornStache Looks Like Henry Cavill's Old KingStache

I feel like Mark Ruffalo can also rock that look.

Chris Evans New PornStache Looks Like Henry Cavill's Old KingStache

Or, what about Tom Holland? That would be the funniest thing ever.

Chris Evans New PornStache Looks Like Henry Cavill's Old KingStache

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